To Shave or Not to Shave
Shaving our heads because of hair loss is a deeply personal decision that no one should pressure another into. I made the decision to shave my hair off because I couldn’t bear to see it lying every where. Waking up and seeing it in my bed, on my pillow, all over my clothes and even in the crack of my ass! Every time hair fell out, I was reminded of my plight and then I would go and search obsessively for thinning areas. My hair started to get really thin, and because I hated the way I looked in the mirror and the new texture of my hair which was no longer soft or beautiful, I shaved it. It was a way of taking control of my hair loss, and bringing closure to my emotional pain. It actually allowed me to begin the healing process, because I was no longer concerned with how much hair was falling out and when it would stop. I stopped it! In shaving my head, I found over time that I actually look pretty baring my dome. You couldn’t have convinced me of that five years ago, but when I finally brought closure to my hair loss, I was able to see new possibilities for my life.
I always loved my hair and it was so long and beautiful…it framed my face and I could style it according to my mood. I would just about throw up getting so nervous every time I would go for a haircut, and I would sit there ready to pee my pants if the stylist took just a little more than I told her to. My hair was everything to me.
Well, after deciding to stay bald and not let my healthy hair that is left grow back in, I sat and looked in the mirror for a long time. I took everything in about my head, eyes, nose, lips, ears and neck. I looked for my beauty, and holy crap did I start to cry! I realized at that moment that with out my hair, there are no distractions to take away the curve of my nose, the hue and depth of my eyes, my peculiar shaped ears (which my grand baby inherited from me), the softness of my skin and the overall beauty of my face. How come I never noticed before? How could a “bad hair day” bother me so much back then, when my hair was never the attribute that made me beautiful?
Kimberly on Tue, 18th Nov 2008 1:09 am
Angela you are one the coolest most inspiring “net women” I have met. Thank you for making this blog, you and Y and the others have helped so many of us, I cannot say thank you enough.
With gratitude ~ Kimberly
Angela on Tue, 18th Nov 2008 2:10 am
Thank you Kimberly for your kind words.
Avis on Tue, 18th Nov 2008 9:00 am
Angela,
I have said before you are truly beautiful. Your words are simple, inspiring, and true. Acceptance is elusive for most of us.
Sheila-ArmyWife on Sat, 27th Dec 2008 3:51 am
Hi
I don’t know how you truly felt when your hair started falling out, but I think you are very beautiful and you look beautiful with your head shaved.
My husband was loosing his hair and finally decided to shave it and he too looks good bald.
I know it’s not the same as a woman, but men hate loosing their hair too.
I really like your blog. You are very inspiring to others. Especially younger women/teens
Remember, Beauty is within. If you love yourself, others will love you too.
Take Care
Sheila
Angela on Sat, 27th Dec 2008 4:17 am
Hi Sheila,
Thank you for your compliment. It wasn’t easy for me when I started losing my hair, and it took a long time to finally come to peace with the whole thing.
Men often feel just as much grief over losing their hair as women do. I personally feel that they are hit even harder than women. Men aren’t supposed to talk about their hair loss issues or the fact that it may be bothering them out of fear that they will be thought of as vain. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
Hair is a part of us, and whether we are men or women it is a difficult thing to deal with. I hope more men will begin to talk about their inner struggles over losing their hair.
Walter on Wed, 31st Dec 2008 7:28 pm
Indeed you are very brave and so beautiful. The dilantin medicine I must take, makes my hair grow like crazy even in places I never had hair before. Happy New Year to All!
Angela on Wed, 31st Dec 2008 7:31 pm
Thank you Walter for your generous compliment. Have a great New Year!
Martina on Fri, 9th Jan 2009 3:15 pm
Thank you so much for your lovely words. I write this comment with tears in my eyes and hope in my heart thanks to your story. It is like reading my own story. For me this is my second time aound with the hair loss and I am once again in the Shave or not to Shave mode. This time around I will embrace my natural beauty and not be held back by the looks and comments from outside strangers. I will hold my head high, my bald head and enjoy life…..I just wonder why it is so hard to let go to something that isnt even alive? Thank you