My Son turns 12 Today

Noah Michael was born to me on December 30, 1996. He was the long awaited and deeply anticipated man child that I had been longing for since I was very young. I know that sounds a bit strange, but some little girls dream of someday having a family. My youngest daughter does it! She has already planned out her life (which kind of changes each year…thank god) and she told me what kind of life she wants and how many children she will share her life with. I always dreamed of having a son, and I mean literally dream about it. I had a dream twice that I had a son named Andrew. Then, later on in my life I had a nightmarish dream I had a grown son named Kevin and we were in some sort of war with bombs going off all over the place! I walk and talk in my sleep (alot!), so as I was knee deep in that dream, I was also acting it out! It was so realistic…I could hear the bombs being fired, the house was transformed into a bunker, and I am searching through my own house (sometimes on my hands and knees) for my son. (Side note: when I walk and talk in my sleep, I usually don’t remember it, but if I am awakened mid-dream, I remember the whole thing vividly) Where was I? Oh yeah…SO after searching through my house in the dark for my son Kevin, I make my way up to my room, which in my dream looks nothing like my room, and there laying in the bed is a man sleeping. Remember! I’m still asleep! I see this man laying in the bed (Noah’s father) and I rush into the room and I jump right on top of the man, grab him by the balls and demand to know what the hell he did with my son Kevin! Of course Noah’s father was startled by the fact that I just jumped on him, and grabbed him by the balls…what he said to me in that moment shook me from my dream mid-bombs blasting and gunshots being fired. He said, “Who’s Kevin?” Oh my God! I woke up in that moment and remembered the whole thing so clearly. I sat there laughing, but I don’t think Noah’s dad thought it was very funny!

As I was pondering what I was going to share about having a son, that story came to mind and I had to reflect on why that dream is so significant to me right now. I believe that mothers and sons share a unique bond that is some how different than what we share with our daughters. It isn’t a deeper bond or even a special bond…it’s unique. With my girls, if they got hurt I was always in control of my emotions and would tend to their needs if they were seriously injured. It was like breathing…easy and natural. They could be spurting blood out of their neck and I would be very calm. But my son on the other hand is a different story! If he fell, cut himself, passed out, banged his head, skinned his knee or anything else no matter how large or small, I was about to have a nervous break down. I don’t have a clue why his little presence would evoke such emotion in me. I would literally hold my breath if something happened to him. In those moments all rational thoughts fly right out the window and I turn into this neurotic weirdo.

When he was born I fell madly in love. My feelings have not changed about him in the 12 years I have had the pleasure of knowing him. He is kind and loving, soft and sweet. Yeah, I’m getting all gushy and mushy right now, and maybe even a little teary eyed, but I am so proud of who he is and who he is growing up to be. Noah is filled with compassion and mercy and always considers the feelings of others. He will often times even put the needs of others before his own. His heart is so big and beautiful and his affection towards me never wanes. He is protective over his older sister Shoshannah, and he watches over little Simmi like a treasure. He is even protective of me. When we are out somewhere and he notices that men are ogling me or flirting he gets so pissed! Being bald evokes some very interesting responses from men, I must say. Noah sees it all the time if we are out somewhere, and it makes him furious that other men are smiling and giving me “that look.” Yes, he is very keen on “the look” and very perceptive. He’ll say to me as we leave a place, “Why do men always think you are hot? I hate that! You are my mom and they don’t even care that we are right here with you!” He’s right! LOL

I love him for all that he is. He is a writer as well! I posted a piece he wrote called “The Grapefruit” because I loved how he described the full bodied experience of eating a Ruby Red.

What do I do as he grows and wants to have a girlfriend? Geez, I have a hard time with that one! Whenever he brings up the subject of having a girlfriend I feel like I can’t breathe and I turn into this neurotic freako. What’s wrong with me? I told him very clearly and emphatically that he was NOT allowed to date until after he was married. The first time I told him that, he actually looked at me like he believed me! God if only I could keep that one going. Hey, there are ways that he can date AFTER he is married…I could join an ultra-orthodox Jewish community and decide to have an arranged marriage with a nice virginal Jewish girl from France! Or I could become Chinese and find a matchmaker. Oooo, then there are those mail order Russian or Filipino brides! That would work right? If I start right now, I KNOW that there is bound to be a baby girl that I could get him hitched to…now, now, don’t go down that road! Hear me out on this one…if I get a new born baby girl and she is promised to him, then I have a good 21 more years of blissful mother and son-ness, right? That would TOTALLY WORK! It means that I wouldn’t have to worry about the whole dating thing until he was married off at 32 years old. I can totally dig that.

By the way, I hope you know that I am only kidding about becoming Chinese! I don’t think that is possible. Right about now you must think I am the strangest mother on the planet; you might be right! I am writing this at 12:47am and he will be reading it most likely at about 10:00am, and this whole post is for him! I am razzing him on his 12th birthday.

Noah my boy, I love you more with each passing day. I love your smile, your warmth and your awesomely (I think I just made up a word…is “awesomely” a real word?) warped sense of humor. I know that you will appreciate this post, because your mama is totally nuts! I hope I made you smile this morning of your 12th birthday. You are my treasure, my joy, and my favorite son! You are unique, talented, fun, smart and hilarious when you try to “take your mama down” showing how strong you are! You are strong in so many ways and I admire you. I’m proud to be your mother.

Happy Birthday!

Noah was attacked by a monstrous parrot while we were at the Baltimore Aquarium. They warned us not to get to close to the damn thing, but he just had to pet it. It almost ate him alive!

Is he the cutest thing or what?

The picture on the right was taken when Noah was only four years old. As you can see, he is wearing his super-duper orange floaties! Now, that would be fine if he was at the beach, but he is in a sand box playing. He loved his floaties, but I wonder if he thought he was gonna drowned in the sand? humm? I guess you can never be too safe!