The Sensitive Souls Network

Before I talk about The Sensitive Souls Network, I have to update you all on my “writer’s block” because maybe I wasn’t so honest about my problem. I believe that I hit that middle aged “wall” (crisis of sorts) and I’ve become quite introverted and introspective. I guess that comes with the territory of getting older. I know I’m being cryptic at this point especially since there are MANY things that I would just love to spill my guts over, but it would be in incredibly bad form to do so.

We’ve been here in New Mexico for one year now, and I must say I truly love The Land of Enchantment. I took a trip this past weekend back to New Jersey and I couldn’t wait to get my ass out of there and on a plane back home. There were only four things great about that trip and it had NOTHING to do with being in The Garden State! I got to visit with my daughter, spend some travel time with my son (who came with me to NJ), I got to meet up with a good friend of mine and spent some time with my dad. That’s it! Beyond those things, there was absolutely nothing redeeming about being there. My patience and tolerance (this past weekend) of extremely self serving people is wearing extremely thin (of course I’m being cryptic again!) and I find I now blame myself for creating any assumptions of decency in these types of people…there really is no decency at this point. I really kick myself in the ass for wanting to believe that certain people I’m in contact with are generally good in nature, when in fact I merely allowed the illusion of them being “good” to cloud the truth of the matter…they are self serving, ego-vested, mean people to the core of their being, and no matter how much they want to cover that up with “appearances” they will always have to live with who they are! The experience of my shattered assumptions was enough to make me sick to my stomach. Not because they made me sick in the least, but because I allowed such “good assumptions” to exist in the first place. What does that make me? A sucker? Yup, I’m a sucker! I duped myself into believing things that were only half truths and partial realities. BLAAAA! Introspection is a bitch. But I’ve learned some very valuable lessons about myself and I feel I’ve grown quite a bit as a result of it. That was just a little update on my own emotional state of affairs. Now I’d like to switch gears and tell you all about something I’m pretty excited about:

I’ve been busy building a new social network that I just launched. It is a Network for families with disabilities. I announced the launch on my other blog site Loving Simone, but I’ll also copy it here.

In March 09′ I created “Loving Simone” as a way to reach out to others who may be struggling with the same types of health and neurological issues Simmi is faced with. I also joined several different message boards, groups, listserv’s, as well as social networks trying to get a handle on what was happening to Simone. What I found were some of the most generous and beautiful families struggling to give their disabled children a better life. What I also discovered was that all of us are so scattered across the internet in little micro groups and categories without any place to connect us all.

There are parents out there that may have children suffering with a single food allergy and others on the other end of the spectrum holding on for dear life as their child struggles to live just one more day. No matter how mild or severe the problems are, we need to gather strength from one another and blaze forward in search of the answers that we seek. I believe that The Sensitive Souls Network can be a tool in connecting us with one another easily. I created this Network to be a stepping stone to providing a better quality of life not only for my own grand daughter, but also for all children suffering with a disability.

Reaching out to parents who may have a child with problems but is undiagnosed is another important goal that is very close to my heart. Parents often feel very alone as they take their child from one doctor to the next trying to figure out what is wrong with him or her. It’s frustrating to say the least, and when a child doesn’t fit into any one diagnosis OR has multiple unrelated health problems, parents can feel “left for dead.” I want this Network to be a place of comfort as well as a way to receive much needed resources, wisdom from experienced parents, and a place to grieve if necessary.

I was going to wait till the new year to launch The Sensitive Souls Network, but as I thought about it, I realized that this Network will always be a work in progress with new things to be added daily. The site is kind of empty right now and I still have a lot of resources and information to add, but I would like to open it up and invite you all to become members. Its free to join.

Here are some of the features I put in place, and there are more to come in the future:

• Personal profile page- You can set up your profile to let others know who you and your child are
• Blog- Blog as little or as much as you’d like. The thing I love about this feature is that it can help chronicle your life and keep everyone updated about how your child is doing (or you). I’m a part of a few different message boards, and when others inquire about Simmi, it can become frustrating to try and retell a story over and over. With your own blog on the Network, you’ll be able to write it once and then refer others to your blog about what’s happening so you won’t have to retell a story multiple times.
• Groups- You’ll be able to create your own groups and/or join an existing group.
• Forum- I’ll be adding the Forum in the next few weeks
• Video chat- You can start a private video chat with other members or simply instant message them
• Add photos and videos

Here are some things still to come and in the works:

• Resources
• Main chat room
• Facebook application- you’ll be able to keep your peeps on Facebook up to date with your latest blogs as well as signing in to the Network through Facebook
• Lots more!

As I said earlier, the Network is a work in progress. I value feedback and suggestions! If you have a link, resources or information that you feel would help add to the site, leave a comment on my profile page or send me a private message there.

http://www.sensitivesoulsnetwork.com

Thanks for reading!

Seven Months in the Land of Enchantment

We’ve been living in New Mexico for seven months now…so what do I think so far? Well, for anyone with an interest in moving to New Mexico, I say go for it! I really do love it here with one, little, tiny thing that I absolutely HATE (Noah and Shoshie if you are reading this, close the freaking page)…SCORPIONS! What did I expect? Rainbows and butterflies? Holy shit! Guess what, we’re coming upon scorpion season and yesterday while Dom was in our bathroom, he looked on the WALL and there was a scorpion. He swiped it off the wall and killed it. What’s the name of this particular scorpion dwelling on my bathroom wall? The Bark Scorpion. The picture on the left is what they look like.

Here in New Mexico you can buy one of those handy little black light flash lights. It seems that when you put a black light on them in the dark, they glow. Cool right? Don’t get me wrong, I am very curious about scorpions and think they are really interesting creatures, BUT NOT IN MY HOUSE! I’m paranoid about what’s lurking under the bed now, and also worried about Simmi in her room. This weekend we have to do some major scorpion proofing of our house. I was looking around and realized that there are lots of areas they can come in from. In retrospect, now I’m wondering if Simmi actually may have gotten a scorpion bite. She has had a lot of trouble walking and in the last few weeks it has gotten worse. She does have a small round red mark on the sole of her right foot and lately she has been screaming every time we put her into the crib. When I say scream, I mean SCREAM! She screams like she is being murdered. That started on Monday. Because we have concrete floors that are nasty and unfinished, we always put shoes on her. There would be no way for her to get a puncture mark in the bottom of her foot. I just noticed the mark yesterday, but could it be likely that she got bit? She doesn’t seem to have any of the symptoms of a bite, like swelling, nausea (even though she really isn’t eating much) excess saliva or foaming at the mouth. If you’re interested in reading about what she is going through (it has totally drained me) you can read about it on LovingSimone.com. Anyway, I don’t *think* she got bit, but I do wonder now if it’s possible. They say it causes extreme pain and numbness, but in children it can be very serious. All last week she had a fever of 102.3 but no symptoms of a cold. When I took her to the doctor he said it was probably a virus. It could have been that, but with a viral or bacterial infection, other symptoms are bound to show up. She never developed any other symptoms.

It has been a very trying two-three weeks. My head is spinning and I barely have a few moments to myself. My computer time has been cut down to a few moments here and there and mostly at night, but by 8:30pm I am totally exhausted. My writing has suffered, and I feel so disconnected from my online world. The simple pleasures that seem to help me through the day is the weather here. Every morning when I wake up, I hear the sound of hundreds of birds singing. The air is cool and pleasant and there is usually a beautiful breeze that blows through the house. The light here is amazing. We are entering monsoon season due to hurricane season in Mexico. Lately it is either raining every day or every other day. The humidity is also increased during this time of year. It stays relatively cool during the morning to mid afternoon and then it gets very hot until about 7:00pm. After that, it cools back down and we have very pleasant cool evenings. Being outside in the evening is a joy. Seeing the gorgeous colors painted across the sky in hues of purple and pink just make me take a deep breath, clear my head and enjoy the moment. One thing that is a nuisance (beyond scorpions) is the amount of dirt that blows in the windows. Where we live, there always seems to be two times a day when the wind picks up and gusts and sometimes I forget to close all the windows during those times. Oh-My-God, this one time we left the windows open and every room had light covering of dirt on it. Everything was covered with gritty sand; the table, chairs, floor, cabinets, clothing, beds…everything. The dirt is very light also, and when sweeping it up, most of it kicks up into the air only to settle once again on the floor or other house hold object. We have to not just sweep, but we have to use a shop vac depending on the amount of dirt blown in. It really is that bad! It’s the price we pay for living in the desert and NOT having rocks, wood chips or even grass covering the front and back yard. Most of the dirt that comes in is directly from our own yard, so we just deal with needing to clean up all the dirt. Landscaping is a very low priority on our list right now because there are so many needs on the interior.

I am officially a raw foodist again. I went back to eating raw foods on June 17th and it has been wonderful. We are almost done with my raw kitchen and just need a few more items to make it complete. Here is a few pictures of what it looked like before and after:

I also just created a raw website if anyone would like to take a look. I had some time on Sunday to create it, while Dom watched Simmi all day. That was a nice break! Anyway, here’s the site:

www.RavishinglyRaw.com

Bald Beauty of the Day

Two Months in the Land of Enchantment

We have been living in the “Land of Enchantment” for two months now, and I’m ready to venture out into the wilderness. Living in Rio Rancho has allowed me to acclimate to the landscape and it has also afforded me the opportunity to get lost in the wilderness last Saturday.

I have always stayed on major roads, but for some reason I was a little adventurous, and throwing caution to the wind, I thought I would be able to make it back home fairly quickly. I dropped Shoshie off at the library to finish up a project that she had to do for school, and because it was just a ten minute drive, I didn’t bother to pack a diaper bag or supplies. What was supposed to be just a twenty minute drive all together, turned into an hour and ten minute odyssey adventure into the one place I feared to tread. I traveled down a major road and instead of making a left as usual to get home, I reasoned to myself that since the road ran parallel to the one I usually take, I could just drive a bit further and make a left, finding a quicker way to reach my house and bypassing all the traffic of town. Simmi is in her seat, happy as a clam with her pink sunglasses on, jabbering away to music playing on the radio and I am wondering why as I drive, all the sudden the paved road turns to DIRT! We are now traveling on a bumpy dirt road and Simmi’s squeals and laughter from the back seat are making me crack up laughing. The dirt road is graded roughly so every bump can be felt and Simmi thinks she is on some sort of magic ride. She just continues to laugh and laugh, and I join in until I realize that there is no homes, no street signs and no one around for miles! My laughter turns to the sober reality that this isn’t a magic ride and it has the potential to be the ride from hell! Remember I had no diaper bag, no supplies, formula or bottle with me. At that moment I check my cell phone…SHIT! No signal either. Part of me was in a little bit of a panic hoping that the rough terrain I was now on wouldn’t cause a flat tire and strand me out in the middle of the desert. The directional I have in my truck said I was going west and at some point I would need to make a left and travel south for a while. But what road do I take? There were lots of other dirt roads out there but those roads looked so small and treacherous. I decided to just stay on the major dirt road I was on and it felt like I was traveling forever. Then the novelty of the bumpies wore off and that precious little thing in the back seat started to whine. Now I’m even more freaked out, hoping she isn’t going to have a full blown scream fest since it was her nap time and no bottle was available for her. Finally I see a large dirt road and I decide to make a left and travel down that one for what seemed like an eternity. Looking around at the landscape and the location of the Sandia Mountains, I knew that I couldn’t be too far from my intended destination. Sure enough I make another left and now I am sure that I will be ok. Simmi takes a whack at singing and notices that her voice reverberates as she sings. Amused by her new found ability to manipulate the tones of her shaking voice, she giggles and with eyes rolling, she is lulling herself to sleep. Then all the sudden I see the road and realize that we are gonna make it! Five minutes after hitting the paved road we came upon our street…AH! I was so relieved that we made it out of there without breaking down or having a melt down.

The adventure really forced me out of my comfort zone and into a place that is truly Enchanted. Although I was worried about breaking down and also about Simmi having a melt down, I was able to glimpse the beauty of soft hills, evergreens and the wide open sky. It was eerie being out in the middle of nowhere knowing that there was a possibility that we could get stranded. It made my adrenaline rush and my heart race. I kind of liked it! I saw some wildlife out there as well; a road runner and a coyote…GO FIGURE!

Over all, things are going well. The children are adjusting to school and have made friends and Simmi is just her cute adorable self. I am healthy but somewhat depressed without Dom here. We had hoped to have a nice little chunk of money from our tax returns to finish up what needs to be repaired in the house, but we will just break even. My plans for finishing the painting, the floors and other things that need to be redone will now have to wait. That is depressing too! I want to finish the kids rooms and restore to them the things I promised, and now it is going to take that much longer. They are truly fantastic children and even though they don’t like that they have very little in their rooms (not even curtains yet!) they are being very patient. I am such a visual person, and I find that I get depressed having to live in a place that can not even be finished the way that will make this house a home. I know that in time we will accomplish our tasks and fill this home with art, furniture and the things that the kids have lost, but reality sucks sometimes. Other than that, I really can’t complain. We have a roof over our heads, a semi-hypoallergenic home, beds to sleep in, some clothes on our backs and my husband still has his job. I would say with the state of the economy and the hard times that this country is facing, we are doing better than most…and for that I am very grateful!

Bald Beauty of the day: